Behind the Gundanium
by Tori Yuki Ichimura
Summary: The Gundam pilots exist in our world, too. I was speaking with them at Komiket, and this is their story...


**Behind the Gundanium**

Tori: I've been keeping in touch with a few friends of mine in the states and they have some pretty funny stories to tell…

Kegawa: *distractedly* Their autobiographies.

Tori: *fires off derringer* They are, naturally, the Gundam pilots.

Ke: Duet is gonna fry you on a stick.

Tori: *smirk* I know… *waves to the pilots on the east coast * Unfortunately, that's the most approximate location I can give you, but, guys… *holds flashlight under chin* …I know where you live!

Ke: Ohhh… I bet they're trembling in terror.

Tori: You know they are. I could expose their location at any given moment!

Ke: Yeah! Then you could get fired and loose your college scholarship and then they could kill you!

Tori: …you ruin all my fun…

~*~*~*~*~*~

[A/N: This is every anecdote they ever told me condensed to fit a few pages, so bear with me.]

**The Arrival**

**USA-October 3, 1995**

            It was late Sunday night when the small _All Nippon Airway_ jet touched down on a Newark airstrip. Seven figures bustled out of the small exit the moment the door opened. Stepping into the dirty yellow light of a McDonalds sign, we see those seven figures are none other than Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell, Trowa Barton, Quatre Winner, Wu Fei Chang, Duet Maxine, and Rashid Kurama.

            "It's f-f-freezing!" Duet chattered, rubbing her bare arms and leaning against Quatre for warmth.

            "Hn," Heero grunted and led them inside the terminal.

            The pilots didn't look much like the mercenaries of the TV show right then. Rather, they look like the average teenagers from their respective cultures. Heero was wearing baggy, torn jeans with alternative band logos pinned all over them and a "Less Than Jake" tee-shirt. Wu Fei had on cargo pants and a plain navy blue shirt. Trowa wore a normal pair of jeans and an open leather jacket over a white tee-shirt. Duet was styling a lovely "I fell asleep in these clothes so bite me" ensemble consisting of a wrinkled black tank top, hip-huggers, and a red plaid jacket tied around her waist. Duo was similarly decked out in a black "TWO-MIX" tee-shirt and loose jeans, and Quatre wore a light blue shirt and khakis. [*giggle* No spandex or collars in their off-time]

            Yawning and groaning, they dragged their stuff to a waiting limo. The airport was mostly empty as they had come in on a private jet late at night. Stealing a glimpse at the huge clock, Quatre whispered something to Duo.

            "…happy birthday to you… happy birthday to *yawn* you… happy birthday, dear Trowa… happy birthday to you…" Quatre half sang/ half mumbled while Duet added a few random "cha cha chas."

            "Later, Quatre…" Heero warned, holding the limo door open for the others. The blond boy nodded sleepily.

**The Next Morning**

            Duo awoke to find himself sprawled out on a carpeted floor. He rubbed his eyes and rolled over. Next to him was the bed he had apparently fallen out of and the sheets he was tangled in. He was still wearing his clothes from the night before, but his braid was undone.

            'Where am I?' he thought. His head was pounding. Wait! No. That was the door. Picking himself up, he stumbled over to the knob and yanked it open. Straight ahead was a wall of starched white.

            "You have to be at school in ten minutes. Everyone else, except you two, is up," came a gruff voice. Rashid.

            "Us two?" Duo mumbled.

            "You and Duo. This is your room that you'll be sharing."

            "Nani?" Ignoring the fact that he had been mistaken for his koibito, Duo pushed on. "I get to share a room with her?"

            "You're Duo, aren't you?"

            "I'm going back to sleep…" Duo shut the door and flopped back down onto the narrow bed closest to the door.

            No sooner had he closed his eyes then the door burst open and Heero ripped the pillow from under his head. "Get. Up," the boy with the tousled hair snarled. Duo simply rolled over to face the wall.

            "Fine. I'll go wake Duet up then…"

            Duo smiled to himself. Duet was not the most fun to be around when she was just waking up. Poor Heero. Rolling over to watch the inevitable fight, he was met with an unexpected scene.

            "AHHH! HEERO, WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD ARE YOU DOING!?" The braided boy leapt out of bed and tackled Heero, who was attempting his own version of the Sleeping Beauty remedy.

            Duet smirked and opened her eyes just in time to see the two boys hit the ground in a tangled heap of limbs and bed sheets.

            "WU FEI!!! THEY'RE BEING GAY WHILE I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" she yelled. Duo and Heero frozen mid-homicide attempt to see Wu Fei step groggily into the room, dragging his sword that had grown too heavy in the early morning hours.

            There was an awkward pause before Wu Fei mumbled something about not wanting to deal with 'the damn homophobic onna' so early in the morning and walked out the door again.

            "School! Seven minutes!" Quatre called as he hurried through the hall. He pulled his navy blue sweater-vest over his light blue, long-sleeved knit uniform shirt while he paused Duo's door.

            "…why are you dressed like a prep…?" Duo asked, standing up and dusting off his black silk boxers. Quatre blinked at him, then looked at Duet, sitting in bed, and Heero on the floor.

            "TROWA!"

            Trowa poked his head out his bedroom door and shot the blond boy a questioning look. He stepped into the hall, fixing the black belt for his navy blue pants, and walked towards them.

            "No! It's got you, too!" Duet shrieked.

            "What are you yelling about, Onna?" Wu Fei, also wearing the blue uniform  without the sweater.

            "Trowa… Where's your shirt…?" the un-braided girl asked, fully awake.

            "…I was going to ask you the same thing…"

            "Nice try, clown-boy. I think I'd know if I wasn't wearing a shirt." Duet looked down, proving her entire statement wrong.

            "Okay, you're all going to back slowly out of the room and pretend this never happened. Got it?"

**On The Way To School**

            The six pilots piled into the unsightly white van (later to be christened 'Peacemillion' before a certain cross-country drive) parked in the driveway of their new house, grumbling and cursing. The boys all wore navy blue pants and light blue, long-sleeve knit shirts, Quatre with a navy sweater-vest and Heero with a normal navy sweater over theirs. Duet was dressed in a short-sleeved version of the boys' tops and a blue plaid skirt with knee-high white socks that bagged over her shoes at the ankle.

            "None of that now… You're going to a Catholic school," Rashid warned from the driver's seat.

            "WHAT!?"

            "You heard me."

            The six frowned and crossed their arms.

            "I'm Muslim," Quatre huffed.

            "I'm Buddhist," Wu Fei hissed.

            "I'm Shinto," growled Heero.

            "I'm Jewish," Trowa snapped.

            "We're atheist!" the now-braided pair interjected.

            "No, you're not…" the Wing pilot replied, shifting his eyes to Duet's gold cross.

            Duet looked down, then up at Duo. "Oh yeah… Duo, we're Catholic."

            "We're Catholic?"

            "Yeah."

            "Oh. Alright then!" The others sweatdropped.

~*~*~*~*~*~

If you want to talk to the guys and Duet, go to www.neopets.com or click the link in my bio. Their site names are Heero_Yuy_pilot01, Shinigami_kun, Trowa_Barton_pilot03, Quatre_R_Winner04, Wu_Fei_Chang, and DuetMaxine. You can also find me, iamasakuratree, but I'm only on when I'm chatting with them, so… Yeah, you'd have better luck on my AIM name o0duetmaxine0o or e-mail me. Ja ne!


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